Thursday, July 28, 2005

Thoughts & Prayers? Please.

Grandma is going for stomach surgery today. Apparently, she has a hernia which has allowed her stomach to flip up over her diaphragm, making it hard to digest anything and making it even harder to breathe. She is also getting her gall bladder taken out.

Step-MIL is going to the cardiologist in Casper. Her oncologist in Gillette has found more lumps under her arm, but they are more concerned about her ticker. If everything gets the all clear from the cardiologist, then they will biopsy the lumps. She is a one time breast cancer survivor. I really don't want her to have to go through this again.

MIL is having a really hard time dealing with the insurance companies paying for the funeral home expenses and the flight for life and the ICU for Josh. She's hired an attorney and they are going to court next week. Like she needs to deal with this right now, right? The woman lost her son and now has to fight with the insurance company to get his funeral paid for. Un-fucking-believable. Greedy assed bastards.

My cousins are coming out for grandmas birthday in two weeks. (MOM - this is a surprise. Keep your mouth SHUT. If I find out that you've spilled the beans, I will personally beat your ass. - Note, I know that this seems harsh. I love my mother, I really, really do. It's just that she can't keep a secret. Even though she says she can. She can't) I love my cousins. I do. It's just that my older cousin has this way of making these snarky comments that make me feel really bad. ie, "Women who have c-sections are lazy" after she knew that I'd had a c-section and I wasn't given a choice about it. Anyway, it's already started, I asked if we could take the three little ones to Kiddie Kandids and get a picture of all three of them together for grandma's birthday and she tells me "Well, I think that's really cheesy. But I guess we can do it" She knows that I get my son's pictures done there all the time, so I guess I'm really cheesy. I know that it's mostly my issues. That I feel inadequate around them because they both have post-graduate degrees and I never even finished college. They both stay home with their children, because their husbands make enough money to support them, whereas, I work. I don't think that it's intentional on their part. I really don't. But it still makes me feel bad and I'm still not looking forward to a solid week of feeling like my life doesn't amount for shit compared to theirs.

Feh, so anyway.

Any spare good thoughts, prayers, whatever - could you send them my way?


At 7/28/2005 11:33:00 AM, Blogger Circus Kelli said...

You got it, darlin, good thoughts, good vibes, prayers, best wishes, sunshine and dandelion fluff all headed your way.

It sounds like you have a lot to deal with just now, and I hope all goes well.

Hang in there...

At 7/28/2005 12:45:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

like i said in my email to you...i can't keep secrets....what the heck is the baby girls name....i remember william but can't remember the other name

At 7/28/2005 01:07:00 PM, Blogger KC said...


At 7/28/2005 02:24:00 PM, Blogger Girl From Ipanema said...

in my prayers!

At 7/28/2005 03:14:00 PM, Blogger butterstar said...

thinkin of ya, girl. :)

Don't really wanna make you feel bad, but I wouldn't be so sure your cousin doesn't know what she's doing. That's a tried-and-true technique of pointing out how superior you are to others, and showing them that you don't care much for their opinions or respect them very much. She'll keep doing it as long as you don't call her on it. You need to, seriously. Even if she's not doing it on purpose, you should find a way to point out to her how insensitive she's being by speaking before she thinks.

But I bet you she's doing it on purpose. Don't take it personally, though. She probably does it to a lot of people. She probably has her own issues with feeling inferior in certain situations and therefore bullies others who she sees as less than her magnificent, well-off, post-grad educated self. Can't guarantee that confronting her will make her stop, but it will at least make her uncomfortable, which is good karmic payback for her bitchiness. :)

If you respond every time with a pointed question ("what about me? I had a c-section", for ex), and stay very calm and grown up about it, like you are interested in her opinion in an academic way, eventually she'll stop needling you when she thinks it's not bothering you and sees that you're not afraid to call her on it. This'll work well if she's not doing it on purpose, too. You don't have to put up with that crap. Fight back! :)

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